Eggs never hatch with held items, so that may be a problem. Try referring to to how eggs naturally hatch, Level 1, Stage 1 (or Basic, depends on how you look at it) Pokemon, and other things that naturally happen. I was able to get a Slathoth (tried Slaking) in an egg with all the moves and abilities that I wanted, on D/P/PT.
As for getting your Pokemon to treat you as your own Pokemon, and not traded, you need your SID, to find out this number, use this code here:
http://projectpokemon.org/forums/showthread.php?7522-Codes-to-find-your-secret-ID-Change-your-ID